Ben Jones

Impress Your Children With the Cutest of the Cute Jokes and with Appallingly Bad Childrens Jokes.



Posted: Thursday, March 20, 2008

by
Too-Write!

Remember the first time one of your adorable little kids told you a joke? Wasn't it just the cutest thing ever? Remember the 100th time they told you the same joke? Yeah, the joke's on you! But of course you still have to laugh and smile like it's the greatest joke in the world. 

It turns out, kids will be kids and apparently it's our job to laugh at their jokes, at least until they turn into teenagers! Hey, maybe that's why teenagers get so moody?
 
At any rate, here's your chance to get some of your own back. Trust me, kids won't give you many chances to do that. Below is a list of some of the cutest childrens jokes around. A nice mix of jokes; the old, the new and the appallingly bad. Enjoy!

Why was 6 so scared?
Because 7 8 9!!!
How did the Vikings send secret messages?
By norse code!

What's brown and sticky?
A stick of course. 
 
Here's the best homework excuse ever…
Teacher: Where is your homework?
Student: I lost it fighting this kid who said you weren't the best teacher in the school.


Why did the radish blush?
Because it saw the salad dressing.
What happens when you throw a green stone in the red sea?
Duh! It gets wet.

Why is Alabama the smartest state in the US?
Because it has 4 A's and only one B!

How did the farmer fix his jeans?
With a cabbage patch!

Why didn't the banana snore?
It didn't want to wake up the rest of the bunch!

What lies at the bottom of the sea and shivers?
A nervous wreck! 

What has a bottom at the top?
Your legs!

What did the fireman's wife get for Christmas?
A ladder in her stocking!

Why was the nose sad?
Because he didn't get picked.
Why doesn't Dracula have any friends?
He's a pain in the neck!

Why are graveyards so noisy?
Because of all the coffin!

What do you call a skeleton who won't get up in the mornings?
Lazy bones! 

What kind of critters do secret agents like?
Spy-ders. 
 
Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill?
To get to the bottom.
 
What did one wall say to the other wall?
Meet you at the corner.
 
Why do gorillas have such big nostrils?
Because they have such big fingers!

Are your kids inundating you with other appallingly bad or incredibly corny jokes they learnt at school? Share the pain and post them below so everyone else has to suffer along with you! 
 
 
Ben Jones is an award winning writer from Australia. Passion and intrigue flow from Ben's pen like the intoxicating wine which drips from an alcoholic’s nose. Ben's virility is unquestioned; his talents obey no speed signs; he is the model of a modern major general. When Ben writes: time stops, women swoon, men envy, children applaud loudly and with gusto and pigs fly.
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Top-level comments on this article: (4 total)
» left by Susan Thom
 3 years 319 days ago.
175 fans.
hi ben, now i'm sad my kids are 17, 20, and 22, but when i see the older 2, i'll be telling them these jokes, even when their eyes roll, and the 17 year old will get his tomorrow. very clever, thanks for an uplifting article, best regards, sue
» left by Myla Madson
 3 years 308 days ago.
48 fans.
Why did the chicken cross the playground... To get to the other slide! Man I crack myself up, the kids just can't get enough of me. Speaking of the kids, where the heck are they? Come on out guys, you want to hear a corny joke? no, ahh shucks! lol
» left by cristina 177 days 17 hours ago.
why was scientist hair wet?

Because he was brain storming:-D

Why don't ant's get sick?

Because there full of anti bodys:-)
» left by Jeff 19 days 14 hours ago.
What do you call a chicken ghost? A poultry-geist

What do you get after you banish a poultry-geist? eggtoplasm
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